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Popular Jokes Of The Year – Funny Jokes, Smart Jokes

Popular Jokes Of The Year - Funny Jokes, Smart Jokes, Cool Jokes
  • popular jokes, funny jokes, jokes of the year
  • Yo momma is so fat that when she went to the beach a whale swam up and sang, “We are family, even though you’re fatter than me.”
  • Teacher: “If I gave you 2 cats and another 2 cats and another 2, how many would you have?”
    Johnny: “Seven.”
    Teacher: “No, listen carefully… If I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?”
    Johnny: “Seven.”
    Teacher: “Let me put it to you differently. If I gave you two apples, and another two apples and another two, how many would you have?”
    Johnny: “Six.”
    Teacher: “Good. Now if I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?”
    Johnny: “Seven!”
    Teacher: “Johnny, where in the heck do you get seven from?!”
    Johnny: “Because I’ve already got a freaking cat!”
  • Mr. and Mrs. Brown had two sons. One was named Mind Your Own Business & the other was named Trouble. One day the two boys decided to play hide and seek. Trouble hid while Mind Your Own Business counted to one hundred. Mind Your Own Business began looking for his brother behind garbage cans and bushes. Then he started looking in and under cars until a police man approached him and asked, “What are you doing?” “Playing a game,” the boy replied. “What is your name?” the officer questioned. “Mind Your Own Business.” Furious the policeman inquired, “Are you looking for trouble?!” The boy replied, “Why, yes.”
  • popular jokes, funny jokes, jokes of the year
  • Yo momma’s so fat and old when God said, “Let there be light,” he asked your mother to move out of the way.
  • popular jokes, funny jokes, jokes of the year
  • Teacher: “Kids, what does the chicken give you?”
    Student: “Meat!”
    Teacher: “Very good! Now what does the pig give you?”
    Student: “Bacon!”
    Teacher: “Great! And what does the fat cow give you?”
    Student: “Homework!”
  • My friend thinks he is smart. He told me an onion is the only food that makes you cry, so I threw a coconut at his face.
  • I asked a Chinese girl for her number. She said, “Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!” I said, “Wow!” Then her friend said, “She means 666-3629.”
  • A child asked his father, “How were people born?” So his father said, “Adam and Eve made babies, then their babies became adults and made babies, and so on.” The child then went to his mother, asked her the same question and she told him, “We were monkeys then we evolved to become like we are now.” The child ran back to his father and said, “You lied to me!” His father replied, “No, your mom was talking about her side of the family.”
  • Yo momma is so fat that Dora can’t even explore her!
  • Yo momma is so fat her bellybutton gets home 15 minutes before she does.
  • Yo momma is so stupid when an intruder broke into her house, she ran downstairs, dialed 9-1-1 on the microwave, and couldn’t find the “CALL” button.
  • Yo momma is so fat when she sat on WalMart, she lowered the prices.
  • Do not be racist; be like Mario. He’s an Italian plumber, who was made by the Japanese, speaks English, looks like a Mexican, jumps like a black man, and grabs coins like a Jew!
  • Reporter: “Excuse me, may I interview you?”
    Man: “Yes!”
    Reporter: “Name?”
    Man: “Abdul Al-Rhazim.”
    Reporter: “Sex?”
    Man: “Three to five times a week.”
    Reporter: “No no! I mean male or female?”
    Man: “Yes, male, female… sometimes camel.”
    Reporter: “Holy cow!”
    Man: “Yes, cow, sheep… animals in general.”
    Reporter: “But isn’t that hostile?”
    Man: “Yes, horse style, dog style, any style.”
    Reporter: “Oh dear!”
    Man: “No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch.”
  • Yo Momma’s so fat when I told her to touch her toes she said, “What are those”?
  • What did God say when he made the first black man? “Damn, I burnt one.”
  • Your momma is so ugly she made One Direction go another direction.
  • Yo momma so stupid she stuck a battery up her ass and said, “I GOT THE POWER!”
  • Yo momma’s so stupid, she put two quarters in her ears and thought she was listening to 50 Cent.
  • Q: Is Google male or female?
    A: Female, because it doesn’t let you finish a sentence before making a suggestion.
  • Yo momma is so hairy, when she went to the movie theater to see Star Wars, everybody screamed and said, “IT’S CHEWBACCA!”
  • What do you call a deer with no eyes? I have no I-Deer.
  • On the roof of a very tall building are four men; one is asian, one is mexican, one is black, and the last one is white. The asian walks to the ledge and says, “This is for all my people” and jumps off the roof. Next, the mexican walks to the ledge and also says, “This is for all my people” and then he jumps off the roof. Next is the black guy’s turn. The black guy walks to the ledge and says, “This is for all my people” and then throws the white guy off the roof.
  • What happens to a frog’s car when it breaks down?
    It gets toad away.
  • How do you blindfold a Chinese person? Put floss over their eyes.
  • Yo momma is so stupid she climbed over a glass wall to see what was on the other side.
  • Yo momma is so fat, when she sat on an iPod, she made the iPad!
  • popular jokes, funny jokes, jokes of the year
  • Yo mamma is so fat she doesn’t need the internet, because she’s already world wide.
  • A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her daughter walks in. “Mother, where do babies come from?” The mother thinks for a few seconds and says, “Well dear, Mommy and Daddy fall in love and get married. One night they go into their bedroom, they kiss and hug, and have sex.” The daughter looks puzzled so the mother continues, “That means the daddy puts his penis in the mommy’s vagina. That’s how you get a baby, honey.” The child seems to comprehend. “Oh, I see, but the other night when I came into your room you had daddy’s penis in your mouth. What do you get when you do that?” “Jewelry, my dear. Jewelry.”
  • Yo momma’s so dumb, when y’all were driving to Disneyland, she saw a sign that said “Disneyland left,” so she went home.
  • Yo momma is so stupid she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.
  • A teacher is teaching a class and she sees that Johnny isn’t paying attention, so she asks him, “If there are three ducks sitting on a fence, and you shoot one, how many are left?” Johnny says, “None.” The teacher asks, “Why?” Johnny says, “Because the shot scared them all off.” The teacher says, “No, two, but I like how you’re thinking.” Johnny asks the teacher, “If you see three women walking out of an ice cream parlor, one is licking her ice cream, one is sucking her ice cream, and one is biting her ice cream, which one is married?” The teacher says, “The one sucking her ice cream.” Johnny says, “No, the one with the wedding ring, but I like how you’re thinking!”
  • Q: What did the duck say when he bought lipstick?
    A: “Put it on my bill.”
  • Yo momma is so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas and it’s still printing.
  • Yo momma is so fat when she got on the scale it said, “I need your weight not your phone number.”
  • popular jokes, funny jokes, jokes of the year
  • Yo momma’s so fat, that when she fell, no one was laughing but the ground was cracking up.
  • Yo mamma is so ugly when she tried to join an ugly contest they said, “Sorry, no professionals.”
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  • popular jokes, funny jokes, jokes of the year
  • Yo mamma is so fat she walked past the TV and I missed 3 episodes.
  • Why did Mickey Mouse go to space? To visit Pluto.
  • A black boy walks into the kitchen where his mother is baking and accidentally pulls the flour over onto his head. He turns to his mother and says, “Look Mama, I’m a white boy!” His mother smacks him and says, “Go tell your Daddy what you just said!” The boy finds his father and says, “Look Daddy, I’m a white boy!” His Daddy bends him over, spanks him, stands the boy back up, and says, “Now, what do you have to say for yourself?” The boy replies, “I’ve only been a white boy for five minutes and I already hate you black people!”
  • Yo momma’s so fat she needs cheat codes for Wii Fit.
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  • Yo momma is so fat when she went to KFC the cashier asked, “What size bucket?” and yo momma said, “The one on the roof.”
  • A black Jewish boy runs home from school one day and asks his father, “Daddy, am I more Jewish or more black?” The dad replies, “Why do you want to know, son?” “Because a kid at school is selling a bike for $50 and I want to know if I should talk him down to $40 or just steal it!”
  • popular jokes, funny jokes, jokes of the year
  • Why did I get divorced? Well, last week was my birthday. My wife didn’t wish me a happy birthday. My parents forgot and so did my kids. I went to work and even my colleagues didn’t wish me a happy birthday. As I entered my office, my secretary said, “Happy birthday, boss!” I felt so special. She asked me out for lunch. After lunch, she invited me to her apartment. We went there and she said, “Do you mind if I go into the bedroom for a minute?” “Okay,” I said. She came out 5 minutes later with a birthday cake, my wife, my parents, my kids, my friends, & my colleagues all yelling, “SURPRISE!!!” while I was waiting on the sofa… naked.
  • Yo momma’s so fat, that when she went to the zoo, the hippos got jealous.
  • A blonde and a redhead have a ranch. They have just lost their bull. The women need to buy another, but only have $500. The redhead tells the blonde, “I will go to the market and see if I can find one for under that amount. If I can, I will send you a telegram.” She goes to the market and finds one for $499. Having only one dollar left, she goes to the telegraph office and finds out that it costs one dollar per word. She is stumped on how to tell the blonde to bring the truck and trailer. Finally, she tells the telegraph operator to send the word “comfortable.” Skeptical, the operator asks, “How will she know to come with the trailer from just that word?” The redhead replies, “She’s a blonde so she reads slow: ‘Come for ta bull.'”
  • A teacher asked her students to use the word “beans” in a sentence. “My father grows beans,” said one girl. “My mother cooks beans,” said a boy. A third student spoke up, “We are all human beans.”
  • Why does Beyoncé sing “to the left, to the left”? Because black people have no rights!
  • Yo momma is so stupid she brought a spoon to the super bowl.
  • Yo momma is so fat that when she saw a yellow school bus go by full of white kids she ran after it yelling, “TWINKIE!”
  • popular jokes, funny jokes, jokes of the year

Credit goest to : 123hindijokes.com


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